We have made it. The 2026-27 NBA Season is officially upon us, which means it is time for me to confidently predict the eight months of professional basketball perfectly.
Final NBA Standings, Award Winners, Champions, and more (actually that is it I think.)
Some of these will make me look like a genius. Others will be screenshotted by a guy named something like @BrunsonLover69 and sent to me over and over once I am proven extremely incorrect (No I still don’t believe in Brunson. Fraudulent run.)
All I ask for before the big reveal is if you are going to tell me I don’t know ball, please put your own predictions in writing and post them first. We are all leaving a paper trail.
Lets begin.
REGULAR SESON STANDINGS / RECORDS
Okay part 1, records / standings. I have made sure to include actual final records with each team (not just standings) so that everyone can go make a monster parlay with all of this combined and we can all retire together. It’s going to be awesome.
It’s perfect.
For the casuals that don’t know which of these are “hot takes” according to Vegas (furthest from Vegas line) I will even go into more detail below so you can sound like a genius to your friends or random strangers you end up talking ball with for some reason (one for each conference).
INDIANA PACERS – Vegas has the Pacers at 44.5 wins. I spit out my drink when I saw this and fell to my knees, thanking God for the free money he just gifted anyone and everyone who takes this over. Last year for the Pacers was not real. That was a season from hell highlighted by your franchise player missing every single game. The same player who just 2 seasons ago, was about one half of basketball away from bringing this team an NBA Championship in Game 7 of the Finals. Tyrese Haliburton is a Top 10 player in the NBA when healthy (maybe a hot take on its own, but true. Go look at my most recent Top 100 Players.) You give Haliburton a new toy in Ivica Zubac, who was an All-Star caliber player 2 seasons ago for some reason, and will help this team Pick & Roll opponents to death. This team is fun and is going to make noise.
PORTLAND TRAIL BLAZERS – Okay everyone. We are going to buy Trail Blazers stock. Scary, I know. But this will make us real US Dollars. Is there a world where this goes horribly horribly horribly horribly wrong and the Blazers end up trading Jrue Holiday, putting Damian Lillard in hospice after another horrible injury, and Ja Morant in a high security prison? Yes. But. Maybe not! Deni Advija was the breakout player of the NBA last year. He’s amazing at driving / dishing the rock. You give this cat a guy who is such a good shooter that he could win the Three Point Contest with a torn Achilles (proven true statement) and that is trouble for the league. Jrue Holiday is still among the league’s finest in perimeter defense. Kling Kong has become a force of nature down low securing loads of boards and inviting the league to his nightly Block Party. Ja Morant was a gamble, but the best part of gambling is sometimes you surprise yourself and win. Blazers are going to have a great season and finish 6th in the West.
Okay, now that everyone has their end of season record bets placed, let’s get into Final awards / champions / All-NBA picks.
While I am NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY LOSSES, I would suggest taking out multiple loans to put on a +52948426 odds parlay of all this smacking.
I do fear we have entered the Wemby era, and as long as Wet Bananas is healthy, he is basically a lock for DPOY and a very strong bet for MVP if his teams remain relevant (which they will.)
Caleb Wilson for Rookie of the Year. I was on Darius Acuff before the draft, but unfortunately he was drafted to the Kings where everything goes to die. Therefore, Caleb is the new pick. FUN pick. He will get the reigns right away in Chicago where he is going to do a little bit of everything (sometimes a lot of bit). I’m predicting he’s a 21, 6, 4 guy in his first season, edging out Cam Boozer for ROTY.
6MOTY: If Dylan Harper remains a sixth man, this award will be his as long as he comes off the bench. The next Ginobili? Only thing with this is at what point does he become so good that you are forced to run 3 starting point guards in San Antonio?
Most Improved: Yucky pick. Will not be a fun watch. But the true sickos will unfortunately spend some of their free time watching Bucks games this season. On this Bucks team is the recently acquired Kel’el Ware from Miami. While the Bucks will be awful, I do think Ware is going to be a major part of this team, if not the only part of this team outside of Tyler Herro. In games last season when Ware was playing without Adebayo to take his opportunities, Ware would regularly put up 15 points, 15 rebounds, and 2 blocks. Being in Milwaukee, Ware will not only get more opportunities, but more opportunities than he probably would prefer. He is going to have a great (statistical) season. MIP.
Coach of the Year: Will Hardy only because I think he will have one of the best offenses in the NBA (we will disregard also having one of the worst defenses) and out perform what people thought this team would be this season.
ALL NBA PICKS: I don’t think there is anything TOO insane here. Maybe Embiid as a second teamer is crazy to people. He has been banged up year after year but I truly believe he is still a top 10-15ish player when he is playing at full force. If Jo is motivated this year with the new team and plays, he will be the best player on the 76ers and back to a top 3 center in the league.